Most often as birth doulas, we’ll talk about and share ways in which we support the birthing person during pregnancy and birth. That’s fair, though, right? Birthing people are doing a good portion of the work, and will need that support as they move through the process. 

But did you know? Birth doulas also provide a lot of support specifically for partners, too! How? 

We help share the load of the support a birthing person needs. 

Birth can take a while. Partners, you’ll need occasional time take care of your own needs. Go ahead, take a nap. Go get lunch or dinner. Step outside to get some fresh air or update your anxious family members. Alternatively, we can be the ones who step out to update your family, or grab you a bite to eat bedside.

Having a birth doula by your side ensures that your birthing person is still receiving the support they need, while you fill up your own reserves. This way, you can be there when they need you most!

We normalize. 

Birth is… well, it’s birthy. It can be an experience straight out of the textbooks, or it can be an experience we never envisioned. A birth doula plays an important role in either case. 

We can tell you that yes, this really is normal and expected (even if it feels like there’s no possible way that it’s true!), or help you plan for and discuss decisions that may change the course of your baby’s arrival. The result is a calm, more relaxed partner, who can focus and connect with their beloved, instead of worrying about what comes next.

Allow us to be an In-Person Google. We offer suggestions and tips that help a partner’s support shine.

A birth doula’s role is never to overshadow a partner’s important spot on birth team. Instead of replacing their hands in your support, we add a layer of care. This may be the first time your partner has ever seen a baby born. At the very least, it’s the first time they’ll ever see *this* baby born. The emotions of labor can make it hard to recall all the information you learned in Childbirth Ed or Community Prenatals. 

We can be your partner’s memory for your favorite comfort measures and preferences. Or, we can suggest new things that you didn’t even know to try! As experienced birth doulas, we carry with us a learned history of things that might bring you comfort.

To be sure, a birth doula is not an “either/or” for your partner; but rather, a “yes, and” to your birth team.

In what ways did your birth doula support your partner? Tell us in the comments.